Given up on the days...

Ok, as much as I would like to, there is just no way I can keep up with this blog daily - at least not right now. So, I've dropped the day designators. If I find unexpected time in the future, maybe I'll pick it back up. ;-)

Big events happened this week. I finished a project I've been working on for over a year, which felt really good. To celebrate, we brought in Outback - calories in check. The sliced fillet with wild mushroom sauce is incredible, and really sensible regarding calories. Reflecting on the week...

I made really good choices. I was amazed how liberating it felt to keep in mind that absolutely nothing is off-limits, as long as I limit the portions. I think that has been a flaw in my thinking in the past. The scale is starting to inch down, which is the right direction. I went for a walk a couple of times this week. I didn't have any huge mis-steps. And, who am I again?

Maybe this was the change I needed. Maybe I sabotaged myself just with the limitations of a traditional diet. In any case, I am not feeling deprived, and I've had no hunger headaches. Yay!

Today I started with a 100-calorie english muffin, with egg whites and a piece of low-fat cheese. Very satisfying. My eldest agreed that the flavor for the egg whites was similar to his sandwich (I did 1 egg and added egg whites to his), so he agreed to switch to whites next time. Small victory there as well. He is becoming more aware of calories along with us, and so far has been enthusiastic about making better choices. He certainly is watching us, which helps keep me on track. Not only do I want to be around for him in the future, I want to set a better example - and better relationship with food - than I have in the past.

Make it a good day.

The answer to 'Why am I still fat? It's been almost a whole week?' - Day 6

It happens every time I start to watch my diet. I do really well the first week, and I get anxious to see results! Why aren't I the size 6 overnight? Let's explore that question?

The most obvious answer is because I am no longer in middle school (the last time I can guess I was a 6 - back when I didn't know what that was). Ok, ok. The other obvious answer would be because I've spent years doing this damage, and only a week un-doing it. Hey, I did walk today!

I am struggling with my impatience today, as always, at the beginning of a journey. Perhaps I will learn to find the joy in the small things - like that I had enough energy to come home and walk, even though I slept horribly the night before. That I have stayed very close to my 1500 calorie target all week. That I am starting to change my habits.

They say that you have to do things at least 7 times to start to change a habit. I'm not sure who 'says' that - or how many times it would mean for healthy eating. Is that 7 days? Probably not. 7 weeks? 7 months? I hope it's not 7 years! I guess time will tell, and I will let you know.

For today, I continue to be surprised by the fat person staring at me in the mirror. It's not me. It will not be me anymore. I am changing...

Make it a good day.